Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Dealing with winter

Figured I'd start the day off without a rant.
My wife mailed this to me; it actually isn't that far off...

Degrees of Cold


60 degrees F: Southern Californians shiver uncontrollably. People in New England sunbathe.

50 degrees F: New Yorkers try to turn on the heat. People in New England plant gardens.

40 degrees F: Italian and English cars won't start. People in New England drive with the windows down.

32 degrees F: Distilled water freezes. The water in Moosehead Lake in Maine gets thicker.

20 degrees F: Floridians don coats, thermal underwear, gloves and wool hats. People in New England throw on a flannel shirt.

15 degrees F: New York landlords finally turn up the heat. People in New England have a last cookout before it gets cold.

0 degrees F: All the people in Miami die. New Englanders close their windows.

10 degrees below zero: Californians fly away to Mexico. The girl scouts in New England are selling cookies door to door.

25 degrees below zero: Hollywood disintegrates. People in New England get out their winter coats.

40 degrees below zero: Washington runs out of hot air. People in New England let their dogs sleep indoors.

100 degrees below zero: Santa Claus abandons the North Pole. New Englanders get frustrated because they can't start their 'kahs.'

460 degrees below zero: All atomic motion stops--absolute zero on the Kelvin scale. People in New England start saying, 'Cold 'nuff for ya?'

500 degrees below zero: Hell freezes over and the Red Sox win the World Series.

7 comments:

Michele (Rocky Mtn.Girl) said...

Excellent... this is a keeper.

AlanDP said...

You forgot...

103 F in the shade. People in New England start dying. People in south Texas just drink more iced tea and keep going.

terri said...

Love it! Here in Minnesota, we're looking at 20 below tonight and warming up to 10 above tomorrow. I'm using the electric blanket AND a down comforter and sleeping in sweats.

Jeffro said...

In Kansas, all those temps happen in the same day.

H2o said...

LMAO... I would be frozen solid.

Lin M. said...

yesterday in Indiana high of 10. WE won't mentino the 20 mph wind that brought that down to about minus 10.

But after years of living in Cleveland right on the lake. .. I just got out a sweater.

The Other BobG said...

Somehow I doubt Washington will ever run out of hot air...